Poetry poetry, o my love etc etc

Fuck me, today Atlanta was obsessed with writing poems for people that they're too scared to ask out in person. Come on pussies, grow some balls! I didn't put any of them in here because they were boring.

This guy stole all my best lines. Breeding koalas?
Your Grampa Invented Legos
We met at the USA Sevens on Saturday and you stored my number in your friends phone. You were fresh off the boat from Australia; I was the blond girl dressed in red, chillin with the cute asian girl. You claimed that your grandfather invented Legos (I doubted the validity of that claim, but thought that you were fun anyways... very easy on the eyes.). You also said that your friend's father breeds koalas. This is also doubtful, but regardless, I'd like to hang out again.

Not such an unusual advert on Craigslist, except they left out some important info, man or woman?
I WILL CLEAN YOUR HOUSE NAKED (YOUR PLACE)
I WILL CLEAN YOUR HOUSE BUTT NAKED!! CHEAP RATES!! YOUR PLACE WILL BE SHINING AND YOU GET TO HAVE FUN!!

Awesome band name.
seeking goth girl at the NY comic con who had ur breasts signed - m4w (Greenwich Village)
you are awesome. check out my band, it's called Wormcult i'm on teh myspace

I'm not sure what you call a person who wants to have sex with trees, but I'm sure it exists. Any ideas people?
Home Depot Garden Dept, 6:30 pm - m4m - 50 (Coral Springs)
You: 6'1", probably 220", wearing a red longsleeved tshirt and driving a white BMW crossover Me: behind you in line at the outside register wearing an ugly purple shirt and red plaid shorts. I left in my white VW. Obviously I was playing golf earlier, hence the ugly clothes. You are too hot for my oven. I'd like to pour some of my palm tree fertilizer on you and see what grows or sprouts.

For years the popular British pass-time, 'dogging', hasn't taken off in the USA. Are we seeing the beginnings of something new and beautiful?
Haulover Beach Parking Lot (Haulover Nude Beach)
You walked up and peeked into our car while my girlfriend and I were fooling around after a day at the nude beach Sunday. You took your time changing at the car next to us. Did you like what you saw? Let me know what kind of cars you and I were driving and what you did as we pulled off so I know it's you.

This is the sort of message where he probably clicked 'confirm', then wondered what the hell he was thinking posting on Craigslist.
COUCH GUY - m4m (DOWNTOWN )
I GOT THE COUCH BUT GOT REAL NERVOUS WHEN I SAW YOU AND LOCKED EYES. IM EVEN ASKING MYSELF WHY AM I WRITING THIS RIGHT NOW AS I SPEAK FROM MY HEAD,,, OK I SOUND CRAZY..

I like honesty.
I'm the ugliest guy on the Canarsie line - m4w - 24 (Bushwick)
But I've got wheels, and you want to go for a ride.

I just liked the person's name...
looking for Veronica Crump... - 43 (Lithonia)
Someone here must know Veronica Crump. Please let her know that I am looking for her. Thanks.

A brilliant advert, a great way to end the day.
I am man, I saw you woman, you looked and smiled! - m4w - 29 (Atlanta South to Macon)
If you are a woman that has had a sexual thought about a man lately and wondered if he would give you an orgasm or not? Then call me, cause I will and I am not that picky. Call: seven seven Ohhhhhhhhh, six six six, six six thirtytwo. I can come to you. I am 6'1" and white, 210 lbs, not fat, fairly athletic, with a high sex drive.