Wednesday, 4 February 2009

Craigslist Missed Connections Wednesday

Today the theme seemed to be men turned on by farting women in Houston. Yes, it really was.

New modelling and entertainment company huh? Looking for models huh? Sure I believe you.
Lookn 4 Real Woman - 19 (Georgia)
I Have A entertainment Company Thats Coming Up And We Are Lookn For Up And Coming Dancers And Models Get At Me If You Wanna Be Down

This girl he's looking for sounds kind of great. I'd marry any girl that told me that I 'want that burrito up my @ss like a f*ggot bitch'. Wow.
You called him midget Dik - m4w - 29 (Humble)
You were at Taco Bell on Sunday afternoon wearing a LV Cashmere sweater and long blond hair with some tight spandex pants. You were with a much older man that Resembled Mr. Rogers , which I thought was your dad but ended up being your boyfriend you kept staring at me and when I sat down you sat doen right across from me, I kept hearing you talking to him calling him names like midget d1k and frog lips, you even called him sausage face, you kept degrading him and I think he liked it, especially when you told him if he wants that burrito up his @ss like a f*ggot b1tch he is. Anyways y, too make a long story short I really digged you and want to know if you want to go out and do something this weekend. I was the one wearing the bycicle shorts and yellow shirt, and No that wasnt a banana in my pocket I was just excited to see you. : )

Nothing special here, except he has a profile on an amusing sounding site.
Galleria Mall - m4m - 22 (Atlanta)
We chatted a bit outside the mall. Name is Ben you were Brent. I think we should get to know each other, you're very cute. I have a pfoile on, hit me up there

I don't care what anyone says, farting is funny. Girls farting is even funnier. Girls farting in men's faces by mistake? Life-affirming.
You Passed Gas While Dancin At Chayn's - m4w (Houston)
The smell actually turned me on. Would love to see you again...

And last, but definitely not least... This is amazing. I particularly like the way the guy is obviously trying to minimise the embarassment for the girl, by explaining the entire situation in huge detail. Yup that'll work mate. Go on, put her full name in there while you're at it.
you put your ass in my face and passed gas - m4w - 28 (Woodlands)
We were at the ninth hole, and you were dancing on me while I was sitting down, then you bent over and backed up and put your ass in my face, I grabbed it and all of a sudden you let one rip right in my face, everybody started laughing but I felt bad , the look on your face, I know you were embarrased and ran out crying, I know it was an accident. I only ran after you to tell you it was allright but you were pretty upset, and told me your stomach was bubblin you had to get home pretty fast, you gave me your # but i just remembered the first 6 NUMBERS. your name is Lin Shan Wu and live in the woodlands. if anybody knows her tell her Jaime wants to meet her and put this behind us.

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